Torchwood's Unofficial Finest
by HalfASlug
Summary: When Rose finds herself in a dangerous situation it's up to the two people that love her the most to save her. Unfortunately, the Doctor and Jackie have never been the most cohesive of teams.
1. The Game is a Hand in a Jar

_A/N: So this is just pure wish fullfillment as I'd trade in a few non-vital organs to have a DW series of Ten/Tentoo and Jackie adventures. It should end up 3 chapters long but I'm not sure how long that'll take because life is lifey and technology hates me. I'm back to typing fics up on my phone and missing Game of Thrones. All highly traumatic as you'd imagine. Anyway, on with the fun!_

_Disclaimer: if I had any claim over Jackie Tyler then she'd have her own spin off by now._

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**The Game is a Hand in a Jar**

"So have you proposed yet?"

The Doctor closed the fridge door, bottle of wine in hand and rested his forehead against it. Spending time with Jackie was bad enough on a normal day, but tonight she would be in his flat all evening. With Pete away on business and Tony at a sleepover, Rose had invited her over for dinner. This wasn't an uncommon occurrence since they had started their life together in Pete's World nearly a year ago and the Doctor was learning to deal with being around Jackie, providing Rose was around to use as a buffer.

So, of course, it was tonight she chose to be late home from work.

He opened his eyes and looked at the pixelated image of a smiling Rose in front of him. Maybe if he pressed his head against the fridge really, really hard he'd melt into the photo with her?

"Oi! You listening to me?"

Sighing, the Doctor pushed off the fridge to stand up straight. "Yes."

There was a squawking noise, followed by the sound of rustling clothes and the kitchen door bursting open. "What did she say?"

"Who?"

"Rose, you idiot!"

"About what?"

Jackie gave him a look so scathing he was sure even a Dalek would squirm. "Are you deliberately trying to send me into an early grave?"

"No!" he protested. "Sheltered accommodation, perhaps..."

Thankfully he'd known Jackie long enough to anticipate her throwing the apple in the fruit bowl at him so he was able to catch it. He winked and took a bite of it as she continued to fume about whatever it was she was annoyed about this time.

"You said you'd proposed to my daughter, Doctor," she growled in an uncanny impression of Rose the Dog who was currently busy with a bowl of food at the Doctor's feet.

"I- what?"

"Well?"

"Of course I haven't! Not that - that I wouldn't want to," he added hastily when Jackie's glare intensified. "But it's only been - what? - six months? Bit soon, don't you think?"

Jackie folded her arms and the Doctor glanced at the door, hoping to see Rose coming home to save him. Folded arms never meant anything positive.

"It's been ten months," she corrected, "and you knew her years before that anyway. So?"

Pouring the wine out into two glasses provided the Doctor with a much needed excuse not to make eye contact and time to work out a response. The truth was that he had proposed. Twice. It appeared that one of the many Donna quirks he had inherited was the desire to get married. It had been a bit disconcerting when he first found himself flicking through bridal magazines but it didn't seem so bad once he pictured Rose in one of the dresses. She was the perfect candidate for marriage after all, seeing as she lived with him, bought him bananas every so often and seemed to enjoy kissing him.

He'd kept his own opinion on the whole settling down thing though; as soon as the TARDIS coral was fully grown and functional he was going to be out of a permenant address quicker than you could say "monthly mortgage repayments." The only difference was that this time he wanted to run away with Rose.

However, Rose, while she agreed with the whole running away together thing, had turned him down. It had been done with many reassurances that she would eventually say yes and it didn't change anything, not really, but it still made him worry. It wasn't exactly the kind of thing he ever wanted to talk to Jackie about either, even if she could shed some light on the whole issue. Rose had said that it was because he needed to work out if that was what he really wanted or if he was just asking because he thought he should and, if the Doctor was honest with himself, she probably had a point. Suddenly changing species and inheriting half your best friend's DNA was a confusing process, after all.

Still, he wondered glumly, as the second wine glass was filled to exact same level as the other, he'd as good as proposed that day on the beach and she seemed on board then.

"Maybe one day, Jackie," he sighed, handing her a glass. "And we'll be sure to let you know the second it happens so you can cry and plan and do that weird squealing thing as soon as possible."

Oddly enough, Jackie was happy enough with this response to accept the drink with a small sniff. "'Spose that will do. For now." She gave him a final glare, as though he'd reveal he had his fingers crossed the whole time, and went back into the living room.

A long exhale and swig of wine later, the Doctor followed.

"Where is Rose, anyway?" Jackie asked as she sat down on the sofa. The Doctor reached for the TV remote but she too quick for him and switched the channel to Big Brother. Outwardly, he sulked and threw himself into the armchair, but inside he was glad. It was an eviction tonight and he'd been desperate to watch it without anyone realising he wanted to watch it. Reality TV was below Time Lords, after all. He was only watching because that Diane bitch was playing such a clever game that she was clearly a potential threat to the nation. There was no actual enjoyment from watching all the highlights, the companion shows and reading all the relevant interviews.

"The kitchen last time I saw her," the Doctor replied, his attention on the a group of twenty-somethings who were dressed as ketchup bottles for some reason.

"No, Rose the Person."

"Oh, her. Still at work." The Doctor frowned and glanced at the clock on the wall. "Normally she lets me know if she'd going to be this late." He didn't add that she had promised on her life that she would not be staying late tonight because there was a very real chance he would lose his if she did.

"You don't think she's in trouble, do you?" worried Jackie. "Bloody Torchwood-"

"I'm sure she's fine," the Doctor reassured her as Rose the Dog bounded into the room and settled on his lap. He stroked her absentmindedly with one hand as the other fished his mobile out of his trouser pocket.

Jackie shot him a scepticle look. "I've heard about the nonsense you get up to at that place. Aliens and whatnot-"

"Sat right here, Jackie."

"-and none of it sounds safe! I swear, none of you lot are happy unless some freaky thing from up there is trying to kill you. Do you even get payed for it?"

He shrugged. Pete had offered him a full-time job at Torchwood, providing he attended all the relevant training. Of course, the idea of a proper job made his teeth itch and the Doctor had only gone to the training sessions that sounded fun (he'd been in the front row for advanced theoretical temporal physics, but had given health and safety a wide berth) or he knew Rose would be running. As a result he wasn't sure if he was an offical Torchwood employee, but everyone there knew who he was and let him in to tinker in their labs or join them on field missions on the days he decided to show up. Her should probably check to see if he was on the payroll or not...

"Yeah, well, you won't be getting payed enough for all the risk! It ain't safe."

The Doctor nodded along though his attention was squarly focussed on whether Benjy knew what Diane had been saying about him to the other housemates. Inner-house politics hadn't been this fascinating when he had been in the house himself.

"I was saying to Pete the other day, I was. I was saying "Pete, you can't seriously be letting Rose do this stuff. It isn't safe!""

Why hadn't he been more involved? Personality like his, he could have won the public over in no time. Or at least worked out a way to escape when he got bored.

"He reckons she probably enjoys it, thanks to all that time with you. Ruined her, you have."

The cameras could be broken up and fashioned into some kind of explosive, surely... Just as his plan was coming together, Rose the Dog softly bit his hand and he remembered why he hadn't been a very good housemate. After giving the dog a grateful scratch behind the ears, he went back to checking his phone and saw it was switched off. Rose always bugged him to keep it on, but after 900 years of not bothering with such primative technology, it was difficult to remember.

"Saying that, I remember that time at school when she talked her way out of PE by saying it was against her human rights to play netball. Half the class walked out. That was another meeting up the school with her form tutor," muttered Jackie. It was a talent, the Doctor thought, that even this pre-Auton story was still told in the same accusatory tone, as though he had had an influence on Rose's school days. If you gave her the chance, Jackie Tyler could convince someone that he was to blame for the fall of Rome.

He partly was, but she didn't know that and he had no plans of telling her.

Jackie sighed as the Doctor's phone buzzed into life. "The whole choir thing happened the week after. Did she ever-"

The Doctor was saved from having to become an active part of the conversation when a text came through. "It's Rose!" he exclaimed, causing Rose the Dog to yelp.

"Who did you think was licking your hand?" Jackie asked with raised eyebrows.

"No, not- nevermind."

He waited for the message to open, hoping against hope that it announced her immediate arrival, preferably with some kind of apology cake for being so late and leaving him to the mercy of her mother.

Instead, what he read, caused all the colour to drain from his face.

_code 63 tried 2 get out of it stuck with the killer ilyx_

He clung to the phone with a shaking hand, as though he could somehow drag Rose herself to him and safety.

"So?" Jackie pestered, taking a healthy glug of wine. "Where is she?"

Eyes still locked on the screen, the Doctor tried to explain what was happening but it was made slightly difficult, owing to his heart being in his throat. Of all the days he could have chosen to not go into work...

"Doctor? Is she all right?"

Finally he looked up to see Jackie's concern. Something about it started his brain working again. "Code sixty-three..." he breathed.

"What?" She shook her head impatiently. "What's that when it's at home?"

"It's kidnap," the Doctor replied. "Rose has been kidnapped."


	2. There's Possibly Going To Be A Murder

_A/N: Remember when I said this was going to be three chapters? It's four now. Sorry if that has given any of you crushing trust issues but sometimes that is just how life plays out, okay?_

_Also I am super grateful for every review and follow this story has received so thank you to all you wonderful humans. Sorry about the delay but real life is all up in my grill still. Hopefully the next chapter will be a bit more speedy._

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**There's Quite Possibly Going To Be A Murder**

There was a moment where their eyes met and all the arguments and sniping of the past fell away. If there was one thing, in this universe or the next, that the Doctor and Jackie agreed on, it was Rose and her being safe was something they would both give their lives to ensure.

"What do you mean?" Jackie asked frantically. "How do you know? Who by? Is she okay? Doctor, what's hap-"

"Jackie, please," the Doctor said as steadily as he could. Unable to sit still, he jumped up, sending Rose the Dog scarpering into the kitchen and began pacing. "She sent me this." He handed the phone to her. "A code 63 in Torchwood is kidnap but I can't get anything else from that message than that."

Already his mind was racing. Previous cases she'd had that had ended in her being threatened... People who already had a grudge against him... Hostile aliens they had encountered in this universe... It all swirled around, keeping the panic at bay but not making any sense. He tried desperately to remember if Rose had mentioned anything to him this morning before she left that could be important. Any case she was working on, a new partner, a piece of alien tech she wanted him to investigate - anything that could help him.

"What does this last bit mean?" The Doctor whirled around and saw Jackie holding the phone out to him. She looked just as distressed as he felt. "Is that more Torchwood talk?"

In two strides the Doctor was across the room and rereading the text he had already memorised. "No, it isn't," he said. "It's just nonsense. Maybe... maybe she was caught with her phone and sent it early? She could've pressed extra buttons in a struggle?" Even as he spoke the scene played out in his head. He knew Rose. There was no way she would go down without a fight. But he knew enough kidnappers to know how well they usually fought back.

Some part of him heard Jackie gasp, but he had snatched the phone from her hand before he realised he should probably at least make an effort to keep her calm. He hit the redial button and turned back to her, pasting a smile on his face for good measure. "This is Rose, Jackie," he said softly. "She can handle herself."

Jackie sniffed and nodded. The Doctor tried to think of something else comforting to say as he waited for the call to connect but the words just weren't coming. This was as much his worst nightmare as it was hers.

"Is she answering?" she asked, hugging herself.

The Doctor shook his head as he lowered the phone. "It's turned off."

And, just like that, things became very simple indeed.

"Right," he said, pocketing the phone. "I'm going to get her."

Without another word he marched over to the hall cupboard, leaving Jackie gawping after him.

If Rose had used her one chance of reaching someone to send him half a message then something was seriously wrong. She trusted her Torchwood colleagues having been in almost as many dangerous situations with them as she had with him and she had been overly protective of him since he had become human. It had frustrated him at first but, looking back, after spending 900 years being virtually indestructible and flinging himself into peril without a second thought, it was easy to forget that something as harmless as radiation or a bullet could actually kill him. Even now, trapped with a killer, she was trying to keep him safe by giving no hint at her location or kidnapper.

It was the way the text had ended that set him on edge the most. As his own hands fumbled over random objects in the cupboard he could picture Rose's frantically typing while a shadowy figure tried to restrain her. Had she been hurt for trying to alert someone? Was that the last time he'd ever have any contact with her? A unfinished call for assistance that he was too stupid to work out and she believed him too fragile to give?

"Doctor?"

Jackie's voice barely broke through his thoughts and it wasn't until she she grabbed his upper arm that he noticed he was shaking.

"How can we save Rose?" she asked, her voice trembling slightly. "We don't know where she is, do we?

"Oh, Jackie Tyler, I'm hurt," he breathed, pulling out a small device that looked a lot like an old Game Boy with an antenna attached to the top. Mainly because it was an old Game Boy with an antenna attached to the top. "You should have more faith in me by now."

She gave the Game Boy a glance and then him a shake. "Now is not the time for somduku! My daughter is in trouble, you backwards alien-"

"Jackie!" he said sharply. He gripped her shoulders in the hopes it would stop her violent tendencies. It may have been two bodies ago, but the ghost of that slap still haunted him. "It's not actually a Game Boy."

"It says Game Boy on it."

"Granted, it_ was_ a Game Boy, but I fiddled with it," the Doctor told her proudly. "Now it tracks both my and Rose's mobiles, even when they're turned off." He flipped the device and caught it again. "Of course, it still plays Mario and Pokemon. It would've been stupid to have ruined it."

"So this thing can find Rose?"

The Doctor nodded. "Well, it can find her phone and that's a start."

"Brilliant!" Jackie cried. She pulled him into hug that he tried to resist, but still managed to end up with a mouthful of hair and a very near miss for his neck. "I'll just get my coat."

The Doctor, still recovering from hug-induced whiplash and Jackie's perfume assaulting his nostrils, didn't notice what had been said until she had already scurried away from him. "What?"

"It's a bit nippy outside."

"What?"

"Want me to grab yours while I'm there?"

"_What?_"

Comprehension was still dawning on him when Jackie reemerged, wrapped up in her coat. "Lucky I picked up my black one, innit? Better for camouflage and all that."

"Sorry," the Doctor said, rubbing his eyes, "but why are you wearing your coat?"

She gave him a look that clearly implied that she'd thought he'd gone mad. "Because Rose is in trouble, Doctor. Remember?"

He could feel the weight of his phone that carried the message from Rose in his pocket and hear the echoes of her laughter ringing through the flat. His whole body tensed. "Of course I remember," he bit out. "Doesn't explain your coat."

"Well, I'm coming with you, ain't I?"

Rose kidnapped. Jackie volunteering to come on a mission with him. Maybe Rose had been right last week? Maybe eating three sharer bags of Skittles before bed could cause hallucinations? The Doctor pinched himself, hoping the same rules applied with all kind of subconscious mockery.

"Ow."

"What did you do that for? You're such a muppet sometimes."

Jackie was still staring at him intently. Apparently this was reality and everything in his life was going horribly wrong.

"C'mon, then," Jackie said. "I'll drive."

It couldn't hurt to check again though, could it? Much harder to make sure?

"Ow!"

"Why do you keep doing that for?"

"Jackie, you seem to be under the impression that you are coming with me," the Doctor said as delicately as he could. By most people's standards it was all out rude but, for him, it was nigh on polite. Being part Donna was sometimes a blessing as well as a curse.

"'Course I'm coming. She's my daughter! Can't just sit here and twiddle my thumbs, can I?"

Inside of his still magnificent despite being part-human brain, a thousand reasons why Jackie should indeed sit there and a twiddle her thumbs - perhaps get some knitting done as well, if she felt so inclined - bounced around. Everything from "you're too emotionally involved" to "someone has to look after Rose the Dog" and even "teaming up with a completely mental part-human Dalek was a happier prospect than this" seemed worthy of being his main reason. Unfortunately, his still magnificent despite being part-human mouth wasn't keeping up with his brain.

"Wha- No. Just - no. No. No, no, no. Not happening." He took Jackie by the shoulders, spun her around and walked her back into the living room. "I'll let you know when I've got Rose. I'll bring her straight back here even so you can check she's in tip-top condition as well."

The Doctor smiled as he talked over Jackie's splutters. Anything other than Rose being fine was unthinkable. If he truly believed in his singular heart that she was absolutely fine, then she would be. He'd even decided that he and Rose would not becoming directly back to flat like he had promised Jackie. It would, of course, be their second stop, after a quick(ish) detour that would involve some amazing reunion snogging, possibly with some victory groping thrown in. It depended on how it all went down, obviously.

"You can't just leave me here!" Jackie protested as she reached the sofa.

"Can and will," insisted the Doctor. He pulled the altered Game Boy from his pocket and began setting up the tracking system. He'd wasted enough time as it was. When the co-ordinates were locked in and the device was safely back in his jacket, Jackie prodded him in the shoulder.

"You are not going after her alone," she growled. "No chance."

The Doctor would have been a liar if he said he tried to restrain himself before laughing at the idea that he, the Oncoming Storm, Last of the Time Lords (sort of), needed an escort from anyone, let alone Jackie Tyler.

"Jackie," he chuckled, "I've been doing this since before your Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Grandma was just a twinkle in your Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great _Great_ Granddad's eye."

"And how many times have you messed it up, eh?" she glowered. "Besides, my daughter wasn't involved then. It's different."

There was something about that the steely glint in Jackie's eye that terrified the Doctor. He'd seen it time and time again, across species at either end of the universe; nothing stood between a parent and their child. It was time for a different tactic.

"Please, Jackie," he said softly. "I'll be faster on my own. The sooner I sort this out, the sooner Rose will be home."

For a second, the hardened matriarch flickered, revealing the worry and the panic, but Jackie Tyler hadn't got this far in life without hiding her weaknesses well. Her face set into a determined expression and she trooped towards the front door without sparing the Doctor another glance.

"Tylers," the Doctor hissed before quickly checking Rose the Dog had something to eat and drink and then chasing after Jackie down the stairs. "Jackie! Wait!"

She was already on the floor below and didn't look back as she replied. "If you're still trying to stop me then you can save your breath!"

He was taking the stairs two at a time and she was still somehow miles ahead of him. "Jackie, I am a trained professional and-"

"Ha!" she shouted back. "I've heard all about your training from Pete, I have. You barely finished basic and was kicked out half your modules!"

It was a valid point. If it wasn't for his unparalleled knowledge of, well, everything, then there would be no way he'd be allowed on Torchwood property, let alone be on the payroll. If he was on the payroll. He _really_ had to look into that.

"I've still got nine hundred years of experience!" he reminded, deciding it was best not to linger too long on his attempts at Torchwood training. It'd only end in Jackie bringing up the incident with the chickens again and he'd waste precious Rose Saving time insisting on his innocence.

"You're about six months old and probably need adult supervision," Jackie contradicted. She flashed him a sweet smile as she pushed open to the door to the building's underground car park.

"Ten months," he reminded her, giving chase, "and if one of us in need of appropriate care, it's you."

Jackie rummaged in her bag for her keys. "Oh haha."

"Don't laugh too hard. You might have an accident."

There was bleeping noise and a flash as the sports car to their left was unlocked. "You think you're so smart, doncha?"

"Maybe," the Doctor conceded, "but there are definitely things I don't know that I'm sure you do, Jackie. For instance, I haven't the foggiest idea if this universe or the other universe had the better Tena Ladies. Where as you-"

"Just get in," Jackie snapped, pushing the Doctor, causing him to trip into the side of the car.

"Wait - you coming along with me - which we still haven't agreed on, may I just remind you - is one thing," the Doctor said as he righted himself, "but you driving-"

"My car."

"Yes, but also your driving ability."

It was a mark of how serious the situation was that the Doctor was saying the first comeback that came to him, rather than vetting them like he usually did around Jackie. Needlessly angering her wasn't normally worth a witty line, but desperate times and all that.

"There is no way I am letting you drive my car," Jackie informed him. He was still forming a perfectly valid response that sounded a lot like stuttering as she clambered into the driver's seat. He jumped into the passenger side, just in case she drove off without him.

"Hang on," he gasped, noticing the gear stick. "This is a manual. Can you even drive a manual?"

"Of course, I can," Jackie said as she proved her point by putting the car in gear. Never before had the roar of a car engine sounded so much like a death knell. "And I won't land us a year in the future," she added with a glare.

"Jackie," the Doctor sighed, checking the co-ordinates of Rose's phone, "even with my very impressive skill set I very much doubt I could land that far out in a Porsche."

As the car's tyres squealed, the Doctor securely fastened his seatbelt and hoped that whatever Rose was currently facing, it wasn't nearly as terrifying as this.


End file.
